I’m told that when I was an infant I didn’t want to sleep unless I was in someone’s arms. Upon suggestion from my pediatrician, my mom swaddled me tightly and put me in my crib with a ticking alarm clock. And vacuumed as I cried myself to sleep. It couldn’t have been easy but she did this each time I needed to sleep. And along with a very clean house, I learned to put myself to sleep and enjoy sleeping.
I’ve spent my life since that moment enjoying sleeping. And I quickly found myself to be a champion sleeper. In fact, I’m one of those people that operates best on 8+ hours of sleep. I know…it seems like a lot of hours, especially being a mom. And I don’t always get that much sleep, but when I do? When I do, I operate at my top performance.
Lately, however, I’ve had some problems. With sleeping that is. It just doesn’t come as easily as it once did. It seems like sleep and I have had this long relationship and now it won’t return my calls and I’m wondering what I did to tick it off.
Insomnia is not something to be laughed at, my friends. I use to scoff at people that suffered from insomnia. I thought that sleep and I had this wonderful relationship. But now I know that relationships change. No matter how much one loves another, it can turn into a one way road and calls may never be returned.
I’ve been having fights with insomnia for a few months now, at least one time a week. When I saw my doctor about 2 weeks ago, he prescribed me Ambien. I don’t take it every night, but when I can’t get to sleep after a couple hours I’ll take one or the night after I’m up all night. It has really been nice not to have to lay awake all night trying to silently wish myself asleep. No matter how many times I would look at the clock and think “if I go to sleep RIGHT NOW, I’ll get ‘x’ hours of sleep”, it did not change the fact that I couldn’t get to sleep.
And no matter how much sleep doesn’t want to return my calls, I still need it.
Today Andy and I were at a store and when we came out there was white stuff falling from the sky. I actually stopped in my tracks and looked up at the sky. What on Earth? Sure I knew that it was suppose to snow today. Sure I know that we are suppose to get 2-4 inches. Still…. why?
I informed Andy that I had worn my full winter jacket (both of the two layers together) for 3 days and that I was done. Is should now move onto Spring.
I know that is not the way things work, but I believe that it is the way things should work. I begin winter by spending my days ignoring the cold and refusing to give into the numbness of my body. I boycott winter coats and gloves.
Finally, it gets to a point that I can no longer ignore the frostbite that I am getting when outside. I give in and put on my actual winter jacket and gloves. After a few days of this I decide that winter should be over and spring should now come.
Yes, I know that I have no control over the weather, seasons, or much of anything. But I can sure try. In fact, why don’t we all try? Together we can make a difference. Or at least that is what all those ads keeping telling me. Leave your winter coats at home, and with me, boycott winter. Who’s in??