Homesick

3:30am – Cassie calls out for me. I ask what it is she needs. She is hurting and she wants to go home. We call the nurse for a pain pill and I try to comfort her…we have at least 2-4 days left before she will be discharged. Once she has the pill in her system, I go back to sleep and let her watch a little t.v. hoping that it will help her doze off again.

4:20am – Cassie calls out for me. I ask her what she needs. She is still hurting. We call for the nurse again to get her other pain med. Once she takes it, I start stroking her forehead and into her hairline. I whisper how proud I am of her and how brave she is being through all this. She drifts off to sleep. I tip toe back to bed hopeing she actually gets some sleep now.

The highlight of our day is getting Cassie transferred into her wheelchair and taking her out of her room. It wasn’t easy with having to get all her tubing to come with us, but it was worth it in the end. I wheeled her down to the first floor where we checked out the aquarium that they have and then we headed out to the Healing Garden for some fresh air. Like real outside air. Other then being a little on the hot side it was very nice. We sat out there for a bit before heading back in.

It was a good thing we were headed in because Cassie’s IV bag was out and therefore her machine started beeping. It’s a good thing I know how to silence that alarm so it didn’t beep all the way up to her room.

We got Cassie up and into a chair one other time and shortly after my parents, Andy, and Kalli arrived. We all visited some and it was nice to have company. It has only been 4 days but I miss Andy like crazy.

After they left, it was just Cassie and I again to keep each other company. I’m not sure if Cassie over did it some or what exactly triggered it, but she had a very rough night. Lots of tears were shed. She was hurting, couldn’t get comfortable, incisions itched (she can’t scratch them), and she just wants to go home. I’ve tried explaining that the doctors aren’t going to send her home until they know she is well enough to go home without any problems. I’ve told her that this is important because we want her to be able to stay home once we get there and that I want her to not be in too much pain or not be able to move at all. I’ve also told her that every day is one day closer to going home and that soon enough we will be headed back to our own beds and routines. Unfortunately, for her, it can’t get here soon enough.

I made an executive decision that she should take a pain pill to calm things and that then we were going to bed. We need the sleep, she needs the healing qualities of sleeping, and we both need to have one more day under our belts so that it puts us one day closer to packing up for home.

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